The Plan: month three (now with metagoals!)

The Pathfinder, which I read recently, talked about setting metagoals first as a way to stay motivated. It's easier to ignore small goals if you forget why you actually set the goal in the first place, or if the small goal isn't actually helping you reach the metagoal. That seems to make sense, so I've tried to figure out what my metagoals are for each category this month. Maybe that will help me focus on what's actually important.

1. Health

The gym is still going fine. I signed up for an Extreme Boot Camp class this month, too. I've only been to one class so far and I spent the next few days hobbling around like a geriatric invalid... It actually didn't seem that bad at the time, but apparently I was using muscles I'd never really used before.

Eating real meals has gone downhill post-No-sugar-thing, unfortunately, so I think I will have to work on that. That period also coincided with my thesis committee meeting, though, so I'm hoping at least part of my crappy eating was due to that. I'm still not doing well at resisting free food; I ate nothing but that on Friday.

I'm still a bit unsure about whether the no-sugar thing was a good idea. I felt good at the time and I was eating better, even if I felt like I was still eating plenty of savoury junk food. The problem is that I seem to have gotten worse at eating in moderation compared to before I cut out sugar entirely. I said I was thinking of making it more permanent, but I think I would need a closer end point to avoid being discouraged by the idea of forever. I also thought about making it no sugar except for special occasions, but what would count as a special occasion? I kind of feel like I should work on just eating normally, though, without requiring any strict rules. I'll see how that goes, now that my committee meeting is over. If I continue the way I have been, though, I'll be back on (or is it off?) the no-sugar wagon.

I did start getting up early again this week, and it made me feel good to have done my first half hour of work before I would previously have even left home. I'm going to try doing that a bit more often, I think. Assuming I can get to sleep at a reasonable hour.

My metagoal for health would be to be able to do anything I want, without worrying about whether I'm too unfit or something, and also to prevent any health problems in the long term. I was kind of bored yesterday and took that real age test. I think I'd taken it before when I was depressed and came out to be older than my chronological age, but this time I was a couple of years younger. The test's most relevant recommendations were to eat more vegetables, take a multivitamin and do some strength training, not just aerobic. I can do the vegetable and vitamin things fairly easily, but I'm not sure about the strength training. I'm kind of scared of the weights room at the gym, because I don't know how to use any of the equipment or what I should be doing or anything. I was thinking at one point of signing up for a session with a personal trainer so they could tell me what to do. Should I do that? Or should I be able to figure it out for myself somehow?

2. Professional

After my committee meeting this week, I'm feeling like my metagoal here should just be "to graduate". Ideally, I would like to answer some interesting question (or at least make a significant contribution towards answering one), but should I save that goal for once I have the PhD?

I was hoping my star-goal this month, of doing 2 hours of work every day would have made me more productive, but sadly that hasn't been the case. I've done more work this month than last, but still less than in January, when I was newly motivated by The Plan. It's been far more of a struggle, too. I've spent far too many late evenings attempting to stay awake and/or motivated long enough to do the work I'd put off all day. I can do the half hour before I check email fairly easily, because it's shorter and I get a real reward at the end. Once I've done that, though, I kind of feel like it's okay to spend the next 3 hours reading blogs because I've got plenty of time to fit 2 hours of work in later. I thought of making it that half an hour of work only earns me half an hour of email/blog reading, and repeating that throughout the day. Anyone have any other suggestions?
I'm feeling really quite pathetic that I can't even do 2 measly hours of work.

• stage 1: finish optimising the assay conditions, repeat the big set of experiments, analyse data

I'm still on the same "second last" set of optimisation experiments from last month... I suck.

• stage 2: make/find the new reagents I need, use them

I still haven't cleaned up the list from last month...

• stage 3: in vivo stuff

A little progress was made on this (mostly not by me), but my committee doesn't like this bit, so I might not even end up doing it.

• New big project: figure out what I'm going to measure, and how

All that reading I did last month was probably for nothing, since this is probably far too big a project to start now, unless I want to be in grad school forever. Side projects may also not be happening. I need to figure out what I'm doing in general.

I have also done no reading and not written in my lab book. I didn't realise how pathetic this month was until now... I really need to do something about this. I have another post to write about it, too, so I'll save my discussion for there.

I was fairly uninspired and pessimistic about my chances for becoming, or at least feeling, more productive, but the Official Star Arbitrator just helped me come up with a plan. The plan is:

• half an hour of work
• check email
• an hour of work
• read my very favourite blogs
• an hour of work
• read other blogs

It would be nice if I did some more work after that (I'm hoping getting that much work done earlier will make it more likely), but that will do. Thanks, Official Star Arbitrator! :)

3. Social

The other thing the Real Age test told me to work on was having more close friends. I guess that's the metagoal for this category, but I'm not entirely sure how to do that. I'm closer to having the kind of friends I can do fun things with, at least.

I still haven't emailed the procrastination group leader back. I can't see myself emailing her again, now, even if you were right about her being used to people procrastinating like that.

I'm not taking any happy pills and feeling fine about that. I had a kind of awkward interaction with the therapist where she asked if I had an appointment to see the psychiatrist again and when I said no, she thought that was odd and looked up his notes in the computer to see if he had said I should come back. Luckily, he hadn't, but I should probably tell her I stopped taking the drugs. I feel no different to when I was taking them, so I think I'm okay.

Although, I emailed the psychiatrist before the last appointment to say I was feeling much happier and did I really need to increase the dose and he said that my lack of motivation could be a sign of undermedication, so I should take more. I might be less motivated than I was in January, so should I try taking the medication again? I wish I had a control me, so I could tell if it was really making a difference.

I got all caught up on email last month, but I haven't replied since then...

I did have a bunch of fun social things this month, though, which was good. Dinner with my classmates was fun. They are interesting and funny people so I enjoyed mostly listening to them talk, but then I felt bad when they noticed I was so quiet and worried that they were being too overbearing. I just have nothing to say, though...

4. Family

I need to email my brothers and my Dad. One of my brothers just started a blog because he's travelling, so I'm feeling bad for not even commenting on it.

I still don't know what my goals here are. Should I be aiming for being something like close friends with my family or something different?

5. Being Selfish

I'm not sure whether the metagoal here is to think about people other than myself for a bit, or to make myself feel like a better person by doing something nice...

I tried, and failed, to donate platelets, so I don't think that counts. I should donate whole blood sometime. I should also look into the tutoring thing properly.

6. Other

I guess the metagoal here is to do something more worthwhile (but still fun) than aimless websurfing with my non-work time. Maybe I should be working on more sociable pursuits, instead of more things to do alone, though. I was thinking of taking a hiking class, as a more sociable activity than photography or practising piano, but it conflicts with a lab-related class, unfortunately. I should start going to the knitting group meetings again, I think.

I haven't really done much of anything hobby related. I'm taking this photography class, but I should put more effort into the photos this week (also the photos for project 365; mine have been lame, lately).

I didn't end up keeping my room tidy for the whole month, but it has been tidy a lot more often, which is nice.