breaking the chain

Lifehacker had a post last week about Jerry Seinfeld's motivational tool of crossing off days on a calendar every time he wrote and trying not to break the chain of Xs. Seeing the long run of Xs is supposed to make it easier to resist the temptation to skip "just the one" day. The stars were working like that for me, but now I've broken the chain and it is getting easier to let things slide. I think going home and taking a month off made it easier to slack off. When I started this month, I didn't have a string of unbroken months behind me anymore and I didn't have the enthusiasm that comes of starting something brand new, either.

I haven't been doing terribly with the stars, anyway. I've only skipped a couple of trips to the gym and I've done 2.5 hours of work every week day, except maybe one. I guess the things I've been doing longest are pretty habitual, which is a good sign. I've been forgetting to write emails, though, which was supposed to be my new thing this month. I have done a lot better at replying to people than I would have otherwise, though. I've also been ignoring the rule to do something productive on the weekends, but I think that's okay, because I have been a lot more sociable. The rule was meant to keep me from spending whole days hiding in my room, and that definitely hasn't been happening.

I'm not that bothered by not continuing the star streak, but I would like to reevaluate and start again, because I think it's been very helpful. Here's the updated graph of average blog post happiness scores going back to the start of my blog, to illustrate:

(The dip in May was when I was blogging the negative thoughts. June is also too high, since I only wrote two (happy) posts while I was home.)

The first couple of months of The Plan, I was happy just to not be miserable and to be making some progress. Since then, I've gotten used to the way things are again, and notice the things that haven't improved so much. I'm not sure if that initial level of happy-blogging is sustainable, but I'd like to continue the upward trend, if I can. So, what do I do now?

I think I need to emphasise getting up earlier in the mornings. Lately, I've not been getting to lab until the afternoon, which is worse than when I was depressed. I think it's become easier to slack off because I can still do my 2.5 hours of work in an afternoon, so I've learnt that it doesn't really matter if I'm there in the morning as well. Plus, people can't tell if I'm working elsewhere or not. I've definitely gotten more efficient with my work, so I think I need to increase my minimum. I've still occasionally had problems getting enough work done, so I don't want to make it too hard, but I can definitely do more. Hmm, maybe that doesn't really relate to getting up earlier, but I do feel better the earlier I can start being productive, and I will need more time if I'm planning to do more work. I've been going to bed later, too, quite often for good reasons, so I don't want to miss out just so I can get more sleep. I need to make sure I go to bed earlier on the days when I'm just reading blogs or otherwise wasting time, though.

More generally, I need to focus on what I want, rather than just on following the rules I've come up with for the stars. I've been saying that in The Plan posts for a couple of months now, I know. Maybe eventually I'll come up with a way to keep the big picture in view.

I'm starting a new month of The Plan early, tomorrow, since this one hasn't been great, so I'll put the details in there. Stay tuned!