birthday wishes
It's that time of year again, when I start to feel miserable about my birthday. I'm not sure why I'm writing another post, when I could just direct you to last year's. Nothing has changed. Once again, I don't have plans, because I don't want to make people hang out with me just because it's my birthday. On the other hand, I know one housemate will probably feel sorry for me and try to convince people to go out to dinner or something if I don't plan anything and I don't want to make him do that, either. I wish I could think of something to do that other people would actually want to do anyway, but I'm not good at inviting people to do things in general.
The first year I was here, I asked my classmates and housemates to go out to dinner and I made C'landian desserts to have afterwards while watching a movie. I'm not sure how I managed to do that. It helped that I actually saw my classmates a lot. I wish I'd stayed in contact once we stopped taking classes. I wish I were more sociable in general, so trying to do something for my birthday wouldn't be so awkward. I wish I could just do nothing without making my family worry and people feel sorry for me.
I've been feeling mopy all week, which makes every little thing feel so difficult. I missed the bus this morning and felt like crying. It makes me feel like nothing has changed and it never will. I know I'm much happier now than I was a couple of years ago, but I wish I was also better at being friends with people.
posted by Lucy @ 1:01 PM
5
comments
5 Comments:
((((lucy)))))
Aw, sweetie, I'm sorry. I think birthday funks are actually really common, you know? A lot of people get kind of down around their birthdays, for different reasons.
But--in my opinion, anyway--it really is okay to make people hang out with you just because it's your birthday! :) I think most people don't really stay in touch with classmates (I know I certainly didn't, after coursework was over), so I don't think that's just you. But maybe just a dinner with your housemates would be good? Maybe you don't even really have to plan much--just say you want to go out to dinner for your birthday, and do they want to join you?
I know what you mean about little things getting really hard when you're in a funk. :( But I hope you have a good birthday on Friday anyway. :)
I say think about what you actually truly really want to do for your birthday and do it.
twirly
Hugs, Lucy. I usually feel like I should be doing something more fun and exciting for my birthdays too. I hope that regardless of what you decide to do you have a very lovely day. (If I were closer, I'd certainly be asking what we were doing to celebrate such a wonderful person and the day of her birth!)
Birthdays. Gah. 20 years ago, had I been in your shoes, I would have stayed home and stuffed my face with cake and felt sorry for myself. Now that I'm all mature and stuff, I would stay home and stuff my face with cake and skip the rest.
But seriously. I like the idea that you should have a little adventure on your own. Is there a shop or a garden or a museum or library or landmark of some sort that you've been thinking about going to but haven't yet? Go! You'll be doing something special for yourself and the whole awkward social thing is sidestepped. Of course you could invite someone along if you want. But you don't hafta.
Thus endeth my advice. Happy Birthday!
Um, as it happens, I -- not knowing about teh birthday -- had been putting off emailing you to ask if you would be around Friday night, because (long story short) I might be hanging around town for a couple of hours. I was putting it off, of course, because I figured you'd have other things to do, and I didn't want to make you feel bad about having to turn me down.
But, you know, if you've got nothing going on and etc., email me, OK?
Post a Comment
<< Home